A while back, I posted about becoming sidelined when I broke my foot. It wasn’t just a blow to my mobility; it affected me in ways I didn’t see coming.
Well, today, I had my first progress update, a full six weeks since the incident. I was told in the beginning that this would be a slow-to-heal injury. But, somehow I still had higher expectations for today’s report. I was hoping for a change, like being able to use it a bit, an end date for treatment… something. Instead, all I got was to do more of the same- for another entire month!
The first month has oozed by like molasses. (I doubt the second will be any better.) I still haven’t gotten used to being at someone’s mercy. The alternate way of accomplishing anything has not gotten easier- it has gotten more cumbersome and annoying. My purpose, my place in the family, still feels as if it has been stripped away. I may as well be put on a shelf and ignored, because watching everyone go about life without you makes you feel utterly useless and forgotten. Good times.
There are things I want to do that I have been waiting on until I am better. Until I can do them without having to figure out how to maneuver to be able to make it happen. But now, with the prognosis of still more than a month being down, I feel I should just resign myself to living life in this broken state. Just suck it up and accept it. But I don’t want to. It feels like giving up, even though my brain says it’s moving on.
I don’t want to make this who I am now.
Then, my overthinking brain likes to stress about the future and all of its unknowns. Will I need to re-learn how to walk? The muscle atrophy alone is bothersome. Will that include some sort of therapy? Will it be hard to get back into driving? I can’t imagine that will start off smoothly after no pressure being put on my ankle for so long. Will I once again become the anchor of the family, or will everyone hold on to the new normal because they like it better?? ……..
Either way, I’m worried this will spark another bout of depression lows. Better buckle the safety belt, and keep all arms and legs inside the ride. Here we go! 🎢
Have you ever had to adjust the way you live day-to-day? How did you cope, or maintain normalcy?